“Large grey ’72 kombi, seven surfboards on the roof, demanding my presence inside it, hollering, “How much do the tangerines cost? Quanto custa istu tangerinas?” And its bearded driver decoding the subtext of “Let’s hit it, ek se,” while the chemist lady gives me the gaff on the Larium side-effects. “Some people have very vivid dreams…”
So begins a twisted, water-fuelled surf trip through Mozambique, Elvis worship, rave culture, the Transkei and the politics of Glad Eye. We’re all 90% water, walking water features, which explains the popularity of everything from porn fetishes to Port Elizabeth’s Pipe parking lot. The gender sweat differential, though, continues to baffle.